We are all making such big leaps in 2013, moving forward at warp speed toward our highest visions, our soul’s deepest longings; our greatest capacity to love, to trust life, and to live from our greater selves.
My father made an enormous leap 3 weeks ago, just 2 days after Winter Solstice. He had been heroically fighting mesothelioma, a cancer caused by asbestos, for 18 months. In that time he was stripped down to little more than his loving heart, and fierce essence.
He worked relentlessly the whole time, not only fighting to live but also healing and deepening his relationship with his wife, daughters, and son. Finally, when it became the only choice, he made the last courageous leap, back home to God.
When he passed, his wife of 53 years was beside him, he was surrounded by his children and grandchildren, in the home he built with his own hands and the help of his brothers.
When he was laid to rest at the edge of a clearing beside the Lone Pilgrim Primitive Baptist Church a white hawk landed in a snowy juniper bough behind the gathered congregation. A blessing for us all as his life was a blessing for so many.
I grieve the loss of my big, strong Dad, who could fix any problem on my car, who took such good care of my mother, who made friends at every turn. I miss his beautiful smile, his strong, gnarled, freckled hands; his hearty hug that made everything better.
I give gratitude that he was willing to fight to live longer than his prognosis, because it gifted me with so much time with him, to reconnect after years of distance between us.
Four days after my fortieth birthday, two days after the Winter Solstice, my father passed from the physical world. Now we see and feel him everywhere. In the legs of the kitchen chair he shortened so that my mother’s feet would reach the floor, in the faces of his grandchildren, in the vast expanse of the starry night sky.
My father is so much bigger now, because of all the love that he transmitted into this world. All the ways he used his physical strength, his time, his energy and skill, to show love for my mother, for me and my sisters and brother, for the grandchildren, for neighbors, for church members, and friends he met along the way.
Moving into 2013
I believe that many souls are choosing now whether they wish to remain alive at this time of accelerated change and evolution, or whether they would prefer to go back to Spirit and assist from the other side. It is not a failure to choose to leave this plane of existence. Yet it seems clear to me that the most excruciating experience right now is to remain on the fence.
To live fully now, and in joy and bliss stepping into the future we must fully choose to live, to engage, to breathe. Sometimes this means facing our unhealed pain, our feelings of unworthiness, doing “the work,” to get to our inner beauty and fierce presence.
The intensity of our times means that being unconscious is no longer an option. In those moments when we go unconscious, when we are not fully in our bodies and lives, we immediately experience anxiety and pain.
I believe it is also no longer an option to live in isolation. We need to be gentle with our own hearts, and to prioritize loving and tending to those close to us. It is so vital to also include space in our circle for those who have no support, no circle, no safety net.
And to learn to love those who appear different from ourselves; learning to navigate and bridge the great political and religious divides that have been growing between us, especially here in the U.S.
The concept of ascension and perhaps even apocalypse (which also means revelation) is not about leaving this physical world en masse. No, it is about finally fully inhabiting it, with our full souls, hearts, and spirits embodied, and acting out our love of life and passion to create in a million brilliant ways upon this green Earth. This is what the New Earth is about, what Christ’s return/Christ Consciousness is about.
It is about bringing spirit/consciousness fully into our material world, into our daily lives, into our workplaces, into our friendships, into our families. Above all, it is about learning to live life from a place of abundant trust, an joy in what we can create together.
It’s about getting down to business, bringing more love into this broken world, learning to dance with the polarities that make this planet what it is. Over the past month, spending time with family I saw how much I had been holding my fundamentalist sister and brother-in-law at arm’s length. I suddenly saw all the ways that they love. I saw all the ways they reach out. I saw all the ways God works through them, just as S/He works through me.
As my sister Tracy says about our spiritual differences, “they’re just concepts.” I look forward to a year filled with healing of the broken places between us, and within us, and with the new songs, visions, and childlike wonder that awakens within each of us as we tend the fertile soil of our New Earth together.
Night Sky Beauty: January 21st look for yet another Moon occultation of Jupiter, exact at 8:13 pm MST. This time the Moon will be a little past Last Quarter.
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